Like many others, porn actor Chad is ashamed of his gay past.

Is the above a headline you would expect to read in 2021? Sigh. I swear, it feels like we’re back in the 1950s with a headline like that, rather than in 2021.

Despite the decades of work and effort of the now-dead Gay Rights Movement, homophobia and gay shame are as cancerous today as they’ve always been it seems. Otherwise, most Queers — or that’s the way it feels — wouldn’t be back in the closet and pretending to be straight. I see all the Queer boys in the closet on Perry Mason and even though it’s per the script, many of them are paired off with females. The reason I bring that up is because it feels very much like what we see today with all the closet cases with females, whilst some of them cruise guys out of the corner of their eyes, just like in the 1950s or before. Little has changed.

I searched his name and found that he had done gay porn. Was that straight-for-pay or was that gay-for-pay? Who the fuck knows? In his bio he’s all about women, women, women, how much he loves women and eating pussy.

And some “straight” porn actors are ashamed of their gay porn past. What’s that about? It’s about homophobia and internalised homophobia, that’s what it’s about. It doesn’t matter if the guy is Queer and started out doing gay porn, then decided to “turn straight” — as if that were possible — and started pounding chicks. When you use V*agra for every “scene,” you’ll fuck anything and call it “pansexual” which is the newest Orwellian term of the day that some nuts dreamed up for one being bisexual and willing to fuck anything (human, of course, at least for now, until they update the definition).

One wonders: How many more fucking ridiculous terms are people going to dream up for human sexuality? jesus fucking christ! Things didn’t used to be this complicated even when people were out of the closet. It was just gay or straight or lesbian. Period. And some lesbians said they were gay and not lesbian. They were just what they were. They were the terms used and they served us well, and still do, for anyone who uses them such as myself. Bi was in there but today bi is considered its own separate slot with negative connotations. So the busy-bodies of human sexuality gave bi a make-over by now calling it “pansexual,” which has nothing to do with humping pans, omelet skillets or the stove! Back then, no one was “identifying” and all that needless rubbish we have today. Sigh. The Century of Insanity.

With fucked up Chad — I’m deliberately not giving his last name since I don’t care to promote him — when interviewed or in his bio, no where to be found or heard is anything of his gay porn past.

Chad reminds me of this guy that I wrote about previously. He’s another fucking closet case guy — or now pretending to be “straight” and admits to using V*agra for all “scenes” he films to keep him hard — and he has deep amnesia about his gay porn past when asked about it. From a comment I read online about him, when his gay porn videos were shown to him to prove that he had done gay porn, he claimed he was not the guy in the video. (roll eyes) Oh please! Liar. Clearly, he has deep issues of internalised homophobia. He’s only doing straight porn videos now to market himself as supposedly heterosexual. Yet he won Queer awards in his past. With someone that homophobic, seems to me he should consider giving the awards back, since he doesn’t seem very deserving of them at this point.

Chad may be straight or bi — but looks Queer to me to some degree; he definitely looked Queer when he was doing gay porn — and he got sucked off by guys in gay porn and he also sucked dick. But now he’s Mr Straight Dude and claims to “loves women and eating pussy” and no where in his bio is anything about his gay porn past. Why might that be, Chad? Are you ashamed of it?

The first time I saw Chad in a video, he was eating pussy. And I said to myself: He looks like a gay guy eating pussy. Seemingly desperate to be straight, he’s really aged since his earlier/boyish days of doing gay porn. I’ve noticed that women will really age a closeted guy, especially after she “womanises” him: She insanely feels it’s her responsibility to change him into the guy she wants him to be, rather than the guy she met to begin with and supposedly fell in love with. The closet will really age a guy too. I showed Chad’s pictures to mi amigo. He said: What a change! He’s really aged since supposedly being “straight.” Chad, looks like a “bear” now; all wrinkled and past his prime and his skin tone is off. But again, it’s as if he never did gay porn because like many porn actors with their internalised homophobia and gay shame, there’s no mention anywhere in their bio that he/they ever did gay porn. That’s because that would imply that the guy is not entirely straight — and we can’t have that! — and the marketing angle for this actor is: “I’m straight and normal.” In fact Chad refers to himself as “just a normal guy.” Normal, huh? Is he implying that Queers are not “normal?” That only straights are “normal?” I find normal boring and an attempt to be heteronormative and it implies “straightness.” So, no matter how many beards he grows and how many baseball caps he wears to look macho, manly-jock, and “normal,” I still see a closeted gay guy or perhaps bi guy with issues.

Of course thinking people know that all of that doesn’t mean he’s straight. That’s the same script that many closet cases use to hide their Queer sexual orientation, along with pumping out a busload of kids. The thinking with closet cases seems to be: the more kids you have is proof that you’re straight. No it’s not. What nonsense! Porn is all about being fake and using V*agra, so I don’t know if Chad has brainwashed himself into liking pussy and women or what his story is. In one of his porn videos, he was wearing a left hand wedding ring. Is he married to a guy or a female? Well, with his homophobia and gay shame, I doubt he’s married to a guy. Or did production give him a wedding ring to wear to portray a certain image? Or “to keep the ladies from coming on to him because he’s Mr Married Straight Jock?” Ugh. Again, he refers to himself as “a normal guy doing normal things” Is that because he fucks and eats pussy? And guys who don’t “fuck and eat pussy” aren’t normal? Is that what he’s saying? This guy has issues.

There are some genuine straight guys who don’t eat pussy by the way. I’ve seen their porn videos. I guess they’re not “normal” according to Chad and other “straight” porn actors.

And the thing is, these homophobic porn actors are never asked about their gay porn past in interviews. As if the topic is off limits. It’s as if they say, “I’ll do the interview with your publication as long as you not bring up my gay porn past, okay? Then it’s a deal.”

Sort of feels like we’re back in the 1950s with all this homophobia and anti-gay shit. Well as I’ve said many times, from what I’ve seen, most Queers seem to be back in the closet these days. That’s the way it feels as least.

A baby boy arrives, followed by a divorce and 18+ years of child support payments.

On another topic, I saw this straight couples’ porn channel. They have 30+ sex videos of the two of them together. Up at the top in their description it said that “We had a beautiful baby boy born around the time that I wrote this description. Due to unexpected circumstances, we as a couple split up and are no longer together.” Wonderful. So they split up right after they had a baby. Did the female flip out — as often happens — after having a baby and opposed doing any more porn videos? Did she become Ms Prude after giving birth which often happens with females? Did she tell him to “go out and get a real job? We’re not doing this ‘naughty’ porn shit anymore.” Or what? Anyway, now he has 18+ years of child support payments and the (unwanted?) baby is living in a broken home.

Then I saw a genuine straight guy’s videos. He never eats pussy. He’s only into fucking chicks and having them give him a blow job. He said he hadn’t had a girl on his dick since the COVID pandemic began. At least he has the intelligence to know that he shouldn’t be hooking up with anyone outside his current household for sex. Some of these other porn “actors” don’t have the intelligence to know that because they’ve been doing so according to their video upload dates. In one video, this genuine straight guy came in the chick. His dick wasn’t all the way in her pussy, but he did cum in her and he was questioned about it in the video comments. Someone wrote: As explosive as you cum in your other videos, don’t you think it was a bit dangerous for you to cum in her?” The porn “actor” responded by saying: Yes, very dangerous but worth the risk. Really? So you’re insane too? The risk of having an unwanted child and having roughly 20 years of your life dedicated to a child and child support payments is worth the risk of cumming in a female? I. Don’t. Think. So. Even if she’s on the pill, there’s a chance she can get pregnant. Then what are you going to do? I saw this same guy fuck another chick in another video and he looked like he pulled out late. He seems to be getting lax about pulling out. I wonder when his luck will run out on him and he’s told by production or the female, “you’re going to be a father, whether you like that or not?” Chau.—el barrio rosa