A Queer New York City blogger asked that question several years ago.
Hola a todos. It’s sad what has become of our so-called Queer “community.” Most people won’t talk about it. And that’s a form of Denial. I’m pretty much the only person I know who does talk about it. Not that anyone cares!
Unfortunately, there is no feel or sense of community now at all. There is just people. People make up a community but they have to put out the effort for the feel and sense of a community. Most Queers have abandoned that and this happened pretty much when the majority of Queers seemed to have gone back in the closet following the legalisation of gay marriage. Who would have thought that gay marriage would have caused this to happen? It’s as if gay marriage backfired on the very “community” that it was supposed to be for and to benefit, or at least those Queers who wanted to get married and who believed in the traditionalist conservative Institution of WedLOCK.
And considering the Gay Rights Movement died/ended after gay marriage became legal, it would appear that that was the ultimate goal of our now-dead Movement which was something I never knew was the case. Who knew that getting married and trying to be “carbon copies” of the breeders was our ultimate goal. Damn odd, when you think about it.
People don’t need a civil or religious document or dogma to confirm one’s love or relationship to each other. In fact, that often fucks things up. And one would think that Queers could have put their heads together and come up with something better than the dysfunctional and conservative Institution of MarriageTM, considering over half of straight marriages end in divorce within the first year!
Queers became the opposite of who they had been
After gay marriage became legal, it’s as if most Queers did a 180 and became the opposite of who they were during our (now-dead) Movement. Most went from “proudly radical and liberal” to rather conservative regardless of their political party affiliation. So in that sense, gay marriage backfired. That’s because the heteronormative corporatists among us told us to “assimilate” (blend in) with the straights. Personally, I was as blended in with the breeders — and their dysfunctional/cheating relationships — as I cared to be, since I don’t put them on some high pedestal to be emulated.
And when a minority group — such as Queers — is told to blend in with a majority group (the breeders), the minority group tries to become as much like the majority group as possible, and that’s what happened this time. So it seemed that most Queers went back in the closet to “blend in.” Gay guys became Mr Straight Jock Bro to “blend in” so they wouldn’t “look or act gay.” (Pssssst: Internalised homophobia). Lesbians became Lipstick lesbians and have tried to look like and act like straight women. (More internalised homophobia).
We’ve made tremendous progress, haven’t we? [sarcasm intended] Not based on that shit, we haven’t.
And in many cases after gay marriage became legal, Queers got married to the opposite gender — more insanity — in order to “live the straight and normal life to blend in,” which is something they could have done from Day One. They didn’t need gay marriage to marry the opposite gender. This is fucking Insanity!
What has happened to my fellow Queers? Have they all gone insane?
From the “gay gym” to Mr Straight Jock Bro
I remember on several occasions mi amigo/my friend telling me about one gay guy after the other at his gym (which at the time was informally known as the gay gym) — after gay marriage became legal — pretending to be straight. He saw numerous gay guys who had gone back in the closet and they were walking along Market Street holding hands with some female. He saw some of these guys making out with a female on street corners. These were gay guys from — what was known as — the gay gym in The Castro. Mi amigo later switched gyms and some of these new closet case gay guys from the gay gym came to the new gym. He heard a couple of them talking about “my girl” the way straight guys do. One was talking with another Jock Bro about “my wife and I are trying to get pregnant.” So these closet cases were marrying females. At the time, I read an article that said, “Gay guys are marrying females in droves.” Insanity.
These gay guys had gone back in the closet and like thousands of other gay guys worldwide, were now living the “straight” life. To please mommy and daddy? To stop them from nagging about “when are you going to find a nice girl and get married and have kids?” What did they tell mommy and daddy? That “being gay was just a phase?” Right out of the right-wing Play Book? Ugh. Fucking closet cases! Don’t get me started!
So all that is what our now-dead Movement worked decades for? For gay guys to go back in the fucking unhealthy closet and marry females so they could pretend to be straight with their internalised homophobia and gay shame.
Queers also became conservatives, regardless of their political party affiliation.
And most abandoned the words “liberal” and “progressive.” I never hear anyone these days (2021 and before) in San Francisco describe themselves as “liberal” or “progressive” these days. That’s all gone, as if both are considered “bad words.” The few people who do pretend to be on the “left” are merely cultists of the “Democratic” Party. I think I’m one of the few original genuine progressives remaining who has not changed most of my views.
After gay marriage became legal in the non-United States, most Queers also sanitised themselves to try to look and “act” straight. Most gay guys removed their (bling) earrings practically overnight — to look straight because most straight guys don’t wear earrings — and they removed any Queer symbols from their person and backpacks. They had given themselves a “straight” makeover.
So the Gay Rights Movement worked decades for Queers to become “carbon copies” of the breeders, did we? I wasn’t aware that was one of the goal of our now-dead Movement. I also wasn’t aware that gay marriage was a goal either.
Our Movement was hijacked by lesbians. Aren’t they the busy-bodies who dreamed up that revisionist history LGBT(Q) alphabet soup rubbish? Did they move themselves to first place in that silly acronym?
The acronym was originally GLBTQ and there was no need to re-write history and change that.
Our Movement was also fucked up by the corporatists who sold us out and sold our soul to corporations. You go to their sites today and they’re saturated with rows of corporate logos.
Corporate “Pride.” Another sell-out.
I wasn’t aware that the goal of our Movement was to have an “official car” and an “official hotel” and other “official” shit for corporatised Pride, which has become a boring mobile corporate commercial for sucking money out of people.
Sadly, “Pride” lost its way years ago when that too was hijacked by corporatists.
What the fuck has happened to my fellow Queers?
There are those who scream, “Well who do you think is going to pay for that parade?” The people who walk in it can pay their own way. The fact is we don’t need some slick 4 hours’ long mobile corporate commercial called Pride.
Return “pride” to the people and its grass-roots origins. And drop the name “pride.” It should be called Queer Freedom Day, meaning freedom from discrimination, freedom from oppression and for Queers to have the same freedoms as the breeders.
What is there to have “pride” in in the way one was born? We don’t have a parade for people born with red hair.
Who dreamed up that pride shit? I guess that was the corporatists too. They’ve ruined everything else! The whole concept is misplaced. One has pride in one’s sexual orientation? I suppose some people go around saying they are proud to be gay — it’s part of the “pride” brainwashing — but that’s as silly as hearing someone say “I’m proud to be straight.” Why? There’s not a parade for people who have pride in being born with a certain hair colour or eye colour. Fuck the corporations and the corporatist trash who hijacked our now-dead Movement, the fuckers. What useless people.
Why did Queers become conservatives?
Well, I can speak from my own experience in San Francisco’s conservative Castro. I remember the conservatives telling Queers “it’s time to grow up.” Why are conservatives always telling people to “grow up?” They seem to never take their own advice.
For example I saw this headline whilst writing this: Biden charged the people of this republic with fixing it. So the people need to grow up says conservative columnist George Will. Unfortunately, conservatives never take their own advice. Being conservative is not equal to having “grown up.” Or even matured. That’s something they fail to grasp in their insipid mind (the word “mind” used advisedly). And it’s futile to tell anyone to “grow up.” Because a human being does not instantly or even over a short period of time “grow up.” Genuine maturity takes years. And intelligent people know that, excluding conservatives of course, since they are the ones who keep mouthing this shit.
I remember hearing “it’s time to grow up” rubbish being spoken around San Francisco’s Castro from the conservative trash. It was the same time as the conservatives were lying and saying, “There’s no longer a need for gay meccas; gay people can live anywhere.” (Queer people can’t even live in the closet anywhere, morons). The conservatives were spewing this rubbish because the conservatives had long despised gay areas of major cities, particularly The Castro and Chelsea in Manhattan. Related: Chelsea: The Death of a Gay Neighborhood, Murdered by Neo-Hetero-Homophobes.
Does anyone remember when the conservatives were using the term “Gay Ghetto” to refer pejoratively to gay areas of major cities? Quite odd really, that no other area of the city where one dominant group lived was referred to as a “ghetto.” Just the gay area. Chinatown didn’t merit “Asian ghetto.” North Beach didn’t have the term “Italian Ghetto” slammed on it. Pacific Heights wasn’t called a “White Ghetto.” Frankly, I’ve never seen any ghettos with million dollar homes and expensive cars as one saw and sees in The Castro. And the conservative business owners and restaurants certainly didn’t whinge about all the “gay ghetto” money they were raking in over the decades, until they favoured the breeders/straights of course.
The conservatives wanted The Castro to become a Breeder Mecca, which is has become. Today? The Castro is like a ghetto. They can call it “vibrant” all they want, but it’s really quite run-down, there’s nothing there and it’s saturated with breeders. “Him and her.” So I suppose you could call it a “Breeder Ghetto.”
In fact, there was an impromptu dance in the Jane Warner Plaza awhile back. I forget what the occasion was. Looking at the Castro cam, it was all “him and her” dancing for the most part. I saw a few Queer boys over in the distance but that was it. Nearly all straight. This was during the COVID pandemic and many people were not wearing masks and there was no distancing at all.
Intelligent and informed people know that Queers cannot live anywhere even in the closet. Violence against Queers has been and continues to soar. In fact, from an article I read whilst writing this, 2020 was the deadliest years on record for Queers to date. So much for “you can live anywhere” rubbish. Do the conservatives ever engage any brain they might possess before speaking their hate?
The translation of what the conservatives were saying is the following: Become like us conservatives. Abandon that “libtard” [sic] and “proudly-radical” embarrassing scene you’ve been a part of for decades, and become hateful, spiteful, stagnant, sedentary, backwards, prudish conservative trash just like us right-wing homeowners and business owners, and go back in the closet and live the rest of your lives there so you can pretend to be “normal.” The unspoken from the conservatives: “Since we all know that faggots are not normal.”
Bigots! Related: His shirt said, “Fuck You, Homo” (San Francisco’s Castro).
And from all indications, that’s what seemed to have happened.
Because of that, there’s absolutely no sense or feel of community these days at all. That’s why I no longer refer to the Queer Community or Gay Community. If I use either term, I add the words “so-called Community.”
The few Queers who live around me in The Castro of San Francisco have the personality of hardened cement. They act like cold, lobotomised people. Except for one guy. He’s very friendly. His partner is a snot. One wonder how they met when one of them has no social skills? Everyone else around me? Snots. And what does that accomplish? What does snottiness and being unfriendly accomplish? It would seem that they are of the shallow mentality that if you say hello, smile or talk briefly to another Queer boy that it automatically means that you’re interested in him sexually. (roll eyes) Where did they get that from? That’s never been the case with my experience. So, with the few Queers that still live around me, all but two guys I now ignore based on my history with them.
I remember a couple of years ago asking one of the Queer boy snots about his new smart car which I was genuinely interested in at the time. As it turned out, he was the wrong person to ask about it because he thought I was trying to pick him up. WTF? I guess he lives under the illusion that he’s “god’s gift to the world.” He’s not. (roll eyes). I don’t even find him attractive. But after he rather rudely verbally flipped me off, now I completely ignore him. Fuck off! Sorry to bother you with a couple questions about your car. jesus! If you didn’t want to be asked about it, why did you park in front of my building when you saw me standing out there, asshole?
Also, people’s phones have turned them into phone zombies so there’s this wide gulf between people. Most people seem to have no social skills these days. They can’t talk.
Someone asked me if I read the local San Francisco gay rag, which shall remain nameless. No, absolutely not, I no longer waste my time reading that corporate, conservative, pro-Establishment garbage. They lost me years ago when they published a letter saying that it was not the time for Queers to be out of the closet. What respectable publication would publish that drivel? And they didn’t say that they didn’t agree with it either. By publishing it, it implied that they did agree with it. Fuck off! According to the conservatives, it’s never the right time for people to be who they are or to come out. That conservative rag — does it now charade as “moderate” — became a cheer leader for the conservative agenda that ruined San Francisco. That pro-Establishment conservative rag cheer-led for San Francisco’s anti-homeless measures (sit-lie). They also endorsed conservative gay Scott Penis twice and his anti-homeless agenda. They also endorsed the city-wide nudity ban because of 2-4 nude guys in The Castro (The Castro had a long history of nudity, but this conservative rag wanted to change that). As a friend of mine said: I don’t think their writers ever get over to The Castro because The Castro they write about is not The Castro I see or know, and I live in The Castro. And with the help of that rag, the Queer Community at that time seemingly became conservative over night. That’s the way it seemed.
Even though gay guys have historically been subjected to bullying in their past, I saw Queer boys bully the few naked guys on occasion. I have never bullied anybody — and it disgusted me to see my fellow Queers bullying other people regardless of whether the people had clothes on or not — in fact I rush to defend anyone who is being bullied, if it’s safe for me to do so.
I also learned that conservative Queer homeowners prefer to live next door to breeders/straights with screaming babies rather than other Queers if the guys next door are not of the same income bracket. Basura! It was a case of class warfare.
Then the conservative merchants and homeowners sanitised The Castro to make it “Family-Friendly” (a term I detest, since all of the world is “family-friendly” so why do breeders need our small little gay enclave too?) meaning welcoming the breeders to take over the Gay Mecca and make it mostly straight, which they have done. They — including the now-conservative Queers — welcomed the straight and white breeders with screaming babies with open arms. And we saw Queers do their best to become as much like the breeders as possible.
I never knew that was the goal of our Movement either.
Then that “gay” sports bar opened on Market Street. Although “gay” was/is the third keyword in the bar’s description, not the first keyword. That obnoxious bar started out as gay. It’s run by a semi-closet case who says, “I identify as gay.” What will he “identify” as tomorrow? Straight? Why the fuck “identify.” Just fucking say what you are! Why is that so difficult? His business partner is a lesbian. Straights started invading the bar and from what I read the Queers who frequented the bar started acting like closet cases, so I don’t know what the that bar was before it closed due to COVID. But when the bar opened, someone wrote, “The Gay Rights Movement ends at this bar.” He was absolutely correct. It was around that time along with gay marriage that our Movement died — Queers became corporatists and became fans of corporate sports teams and corporations and became Mr Jock Bro trying to emulate straight guys — and our Movement has been dead ever since. And again, these days most Queers seem to be back in the closet. Gay guys trying to “act” and be like straight guys and lesbians trying to “act” and look like straight women.
So that’s what we worked decades for is it?
No, it’s not. But that’s the outcome of our now-dead Movement.
We worked for equality and to have the same rights as the breeders, NOT to be “carbon copies” or emulate the breeders. And with their dysfunctional relationships — where over 50% of straight marriages end in divorce in the first year — why would anyone want to be like the fucking breeders? When I hear dysfunctional couples screaming at each other in my neighbourhood, they are “him and her” couples. They’re not “him and him” screaming at each other.
The thing is: No one that I knew had a high regard for the straights during our Movement, so where did this “we should emulate the straights” rubbish come from? It came from the heteronormative corporatist trash — who hijacked our Movement and sold the Movement’s soul to corporations — at the state and national level who run those now-useless Queer organisations and who live under the illusion that they somehow know what’s best for Queers, of their same income bracket of course. Fuck off, is what I say to them. I can’t stand them and their cookie-cutter “LGBT” revisionist history alphabet soup nonsense.
Gay guys led our Movement, not lesbians as “LGBT” implies by revising our history and moving the L to first place. And “by the time you get through all those letters, the fucking parade is over.”—that’s a quote from Queer comedian and actor Lea DeLaria. I couldn’t agree with her more. She’s not a lesbian, she’s a dyke. And she’s not “LGBTQRSTUVWXYZ+++++” She’s QUEER, got it?! (Related: The official acronym is this shit: LGBTQQICAPF2K+). If that isn’t the most ludicrous thing.
During our Movement, Queers were very anti-corporate, anti-military and anti-Establishment. Today, they’re the opposite of that: pro-corporate (corporate logos saturate Queer organisations’ websites at the federal level, as one example), pro-military and pro-Establishment.
All we have now is that corporate pride shit. A slick corporate parade which is essentially a roughly 4-hour mobile commercial for corporations. Fuck that shit! Queer Freedom Day — for Queers to have the same freedom and rights as the breeders — should be a grass-roots event where individuals make their own signs, free of any business interests. We don’t need a parade stuffed with 18 ads for bars and every techie trash corporation on the planet, with their (homophobic) employees pretending to be “gay-friendly” one day a year. And one gets the impression that the only thing that Queers have an interest in is drinking and bars.
Yet during our Movement it was full of culture and The Arts. None of that today. I remember when the Queers of the San Francisco Symphony Chorus proudly wore their San Francisco Symphony “CHORUS!” t-shirt around The Castro. Those were the days of arts and culture. With the new sanitised Castro, all of that is gone, and so are most Queers, having been forced out by evictions. And the few Queers that remain seem to be back in the closet.
After gay marriage became legal, mass insanity began and most Queers seem to have gone back in the closet by all indications. The “out and proud” variety of Queers one saw during our Movement have nearly all disappeared.
The corporatist trash who sold us out deserve no one’s respect. They deserve everyone’s spite. They’re basura.
Just like most Queers, most “progressives” are a shell of their former selves.
I was on a “progressive” site the day after president Biden and vice president Harris were worn in. The site I was on normally is full of comments from former progressives who still think they are progressives.
Like most Queers, most progressives have become an empty shell of their former selves.
Well, Biden did a few pro-Queer things on his first day in office which was positive. You know how many comments the article had? 7 (seven). There was no interest at all in the topic. Their other subject matter articles usually have between 50-200 comments. The former progressives who were there were talking about anything but what Biden had done for Queer rights. They had no interest.
And that’s pretty much the state of things today. Chau.—el barrio rosa