Gay guys are real men

Hola a todos. Some readers have e-mailed me asking why I’ve cut way back on writing about gay-related topics. They said they enjoyed those articles, found them informative (gracias for the kind words) especially regarding San Francisco, but they had noticed that I don’t do much of that anymore. Yes that’s true. There’s not much Queer-related activity here to write about now. Oh, I almost forgot. There was a poorly attended “Santa Run in Skeevies” last weekend. Nothing special to write about however. It looked like something the Castro Merchants put together in desperation. The merchants deserve what they get. Mi amigo/My friend told me as I’m writing this that yet another store in San Francisco’s Castro has gone out of business. I guess I could write about the straight make-out session mi amigo/my friend had to deal with the last time he went to his gym — only one gay guy was there other than himself, and literally everyone was wearing all-black — where he and all others couldn’t get into the change room because of the obnoxious asshole straight couple him-tall/her-short (of course) standing in the way. The guy was leaning way over and down as if making out with his little daughter. I don’t quite understand this drastic height difference that breeder couples now have, other than it’s a dominate (him), submissive (her) head trip. They were oblivious and inconsiderate to anyone else there and stood in the doorway to the change room essentially having sex right there or that’s the way it looked (although he couldn’t quite tell) for a period of about an hour. Mi amigo said that a few people were looking at them with disgust. But this couple was clueless. Your typical Millennial couple. I suspect if two gay guys had done that the cops would have been called on them. I guess that’s what’s known as “straight privilege” which comes up again later in this article. Other than that, not much happening here in San Francisco on the Queer front. Leaves are blowing. The flags are waving and that’s about it. And because I don’t know what else I could say about that topic that I’ve not already said many times, that’s why I no longer write about it. Like anyone else with a diary, in mi diario/my diary (pink barrio) I write about what I feel like writing about at the time which may or may not interest anyone. I’m tired of writing about human sexuality because I’m burned out on writing about it. Few seem to agree on anything. There are also the different “camps” as I call them. Usually the conservative camp doesn’t agree with anything I say. Well really, neither camp agrees with most things I say. That’s pretty much all I have to say about that.

The rest of this article is written by one of my readers from the EU. I’ll call him a “guest writer” even though I don’t usually have guest writers. All of my commenters could be considered “guest writers” when they give their opinions. You can read his e-mail here:

Hallo – I live in Europe and read your page about gay conversion. My English is not great so hope you understand me. Sometimes when I masturbate I think about being straight guy. I’m gay guy. I get extra excited with that fantasy. No want to be with woman. Find some pussies erotic to look at. It carries my mind where the fantasy overtakes me. Often looking at guy in porn having straight sex. After cuming, I’m back to being gay guy. I was on a chat for gay conversion. Didn’t quite understand at first. Out of curiosity. I played the role expected of me there. I lied and acted out straight fantasies like other gay guys there. Not a lot of guys there. Less than 10. The homophobia turned most guys away. Homophobia and gay conversion go together. I detect a conservative gruop of gay guys there. Some macho alpha gay guys talked about converting to bisexual or straight. Said they became real man after having sex with girl. Fantasy? What did they become when they had sex with guy, a real woman? Alpha males are known to have short lives, get into lots of fights and wear out quick. Gay guys are real men. Wanted to tell them that but never did. You see many gay guys built-up and are manly all over Europe. There was usually one guy on conversion site who didn’t believe these stories, lies and questioned did you really fuck a girl this morning? Why aren’t you still with her it’s only noon? Hahahahaha. Good question. Some people’s sexuality can change over years in their fantasy. Brainwashing is used to try to change sexuality on conversion site. That’s what that site is about. One jongen said he is becoming more attracted to women. Forcing it? Brainwashing. It’s immersion therapy of watching straight or bi porn and you can change and be straight like straight porn actors. Why would gay guy want to be straight? On that site they say vagina is paradise and the best sex you have. If you like gay guys living in group in cities you’re out of style and trolled “you’re from the 1950s.” Gay meccas are bad? No need for them today says moderator jongen. I’m a young jongen and think it’s neat to live amongst other gay guys where we’re the majority. What’s wrong with that? What about Chinatown or Little Italy or Japantown parts of cities? They bad too? The moderator is a ignorant jongen. Says there’s little hate or violence against gays anymore. That’s not what I’ve seen on Internet new stories. You complained about lack of education in United States of America. I see that. Where do people like this mod. jongen come from? Says that gays can live anywhere. Says that if you can live a straight life you should to have straight privilege. These conservatives call themselves libertarians. Like being conservatives. Proud of that. Straights have privilege over gays because of sexuality? Don’t you in the United States of America believe that everyone is created equal? The mod also promotes smoking. Smoking is part of being straight and real man. Enjoy your lung and throat cancer. Guess jongen doesn’t believe that either. Funny, I acted out the smoking part by saying I was up to 2 packs a day. I no smoke at all and think it stupid. Really stinks. My women friends complain about guys that smoke. Not a cheap habit. Each pack is $4-5.00 in U.S.A. That’s $3,600 a year for 2 packs a day at 5 dollars a pack. Some gay guys who talk conversion talk about getting girls pregnant on that site. No consequences. The site’s goal is gay guys talking themselves into liking girls and pussy,, tits. Becoming like straight guys. The moderator jongen admits there’s one bad thing about conversion and that’s how hard it is to get that pussy. He’s very down on gay sex and pushes straight sex. Says he’s not homophobic. Don’t think he has much of any kind of sex from what he said. Some gay guys say they’re turning straight not long after arriving on siite saying they’re gay. Other gay guys join in the locker room macho talk about pussy. Hahahahaha. Their homophobia is only at gay guys. Most on site say what all others say to fit in. Example of, for porn pics they all say “nice.” The mod. says he hates the gay community because they can’t be monogamous. This came up in chat and some gay guys saying they knew of many monogamous gay couples. The mod’s mind not changed. His opinion was on his experience and not any research or evidence about it. I questioned why such a ignorant person was moderator but he best fits the anti-gay message of site. Gay guys say they like lesbians for their pussy because they’ve heard that’s why straight guys watch lesbian porn. All fantasy but meant to sound real life and anti-gay. Can be mind trip and disturb if not careful. I don’t like hugging females because of the smell. Their smell from their pussy or period seeps up out of their clothes. Don’t think to have sex with woman after knowing that smell that I’ve smelled many times from hugging females. That would be turn off and lose erection. Her pussy would smell that reek smell. Having my face down near her pussy and something that smells like that, it just isn’t turn on to me. I’d probably throw up. The smell like having your face near dog shit or rotting fish on beach. How can get into that? Discussion take place between some gay guys and homophobic moderator jongen who talks how much better straight sex is than gay sex. I did have some fun private chats with guys but most were douche. :-( I Enjoy your site. signed, Bram

Hola Bram, that site sounds like quite the homophobic place. Gracias for your e-mail, and by the way, your English is fine. You do quite well. Had no problem understanding you. If only most USians were bilingual or multilingual. Many/most can barely get through US-English. Chau.—el barrio rosa

5 comments on “Gay guys are real men

  1. AndyChrist

    I think I know the chat room your guest writer is talking about. I’m registered there but hadn’t been on the server for months until last week. I usually stay in invisible mode. Agree with most of what your writer had to say about it. It’s nothing but a quasi-support group for a bunch of anti-gay gay guys who are trying to talk themselves into like pussy and convince themselves they now like women even though most haven’t been with a woman to know if they like it or not. Conservatism goes along with the territory esp the cowboy redneck mod. The other mod is just as lame. After I registered I had a few good chats with some guys when I stayed in the “I wanna convert” head trip. Did find it hard to talk with other guys because they couldn’t talk other than single words and one liners. The anti-gay message is really thick. That’s why I don’t hit on them often. Best to stay away.

    Question for you pink barrio — what do you think of this slogan…. “You don’t have a problem with straight to gay, so then gay to straight shouldn’t be a problem either then should it?” Want to hear what you have to say about that. I’ve seen that online in caption boxes.

    1. el barrio rosa Post author

      Hola Andy, your comment went into moderation because you gave a link to the site. I don’t want to link to it. By doing so, I would feel as though I’m helping to promote homophobic “gay conversion.” Re your question: The right-wing like to say “You don’t have a problem with straight to gay so then gay to straight shouldn’t be a problem either then should it?” So smug. To begin with: “Straight to gay” is usually a gay guy that’s finally coming out of the closet and being who he’s always been: A gay guy. Whether he’s lived his life married to a female with children or not. It’s nothing new for some gay guys to fuck pussy, while thinking about having sex with a guy and perhaps fucking him instead while fucking her. I’m talking about closeted gay guys who are living an unhealthy, closeted “straight life” married to a female. It’s unhealthy because it’s unhealthy to not be true to oneself and one’s genuine sexual orientation. These gay guys I’m talking about are called closet cases in (dysfunctional?) heterosexual relationships. “Gay to straight” is a guy that may have come out of the closet (sorta) sometime ago. He usually still has anti-gay issues, he makes anti-gay comments around some people — other jock bros, for example — where he knows it will be cool to do so, and he decides to essentially go back in the closet to “act” straight and be part of this heteronormative society to fit in with the straight herd. He’s happy to be with “The Home Team” now as he calls it. Meaning macho, conformist and heteronormative, and usually anti-gay. Ugh. Being “straight” now requires him to be into pussy and tits — or pretend to be — and usually to start “acting” macho jock. Why does one need to “act” anything or in any manner? Be yourself and be genuine. Stop acting. We have enough phony, “acting” people in our society as it is.

      I should also say this: After the comments closed on my gay conversion article, I received some e-mails from gay guys asking me not to publish their emails or the content. I can say this about them though. Every one of them said the same thing. They had toyed with “trying to go straight or bi” usually from watching porn, and everyone of them said that “gay conversion” turned their life upside down. They couldn’t sleep at night, lost their appetite, and their relationships were deteriorating with other people including their boyfriend in some cases (who wondered what was going on with his boyfriend) because all these guys were thinking about was “conversion” and trying to change and force a change in their sexuality into liking pussy and tits and “being straight” because of “gay conversion” stuff they had seen on the internet. Somehow, at one point, it finally clicked with them that a woman is a lot more involved and complicated than pussy and tits. That’s also what my straight neighbour has said over and over. But those body parts are usually all the “gay conversion” sites talk about. They don’t talk about a relationship at all with a woman and what that entails. They present a very one-sided and narrow picture of a woman. It’s purely sexual. Pussy and tits are only one part of a woman along with the complex emotional part of her. After some careful thought — including one guy who went to see a sex therapist he said — the guys who wrote me said they realised they were gay as they’ve always been. But the upheaval “gay conversion” brought to their lives was so destructive and turned their lives upside down. Most who wrote me seem to be back to the gay person they were originally, which is good to know. Gracias for your comment.

  2. Queer boi

    I sent the link to this to a queer friend of mine. He called me about an hour later and said he had a confession to make. He said he had been on some of these sites and had flirted with what it would be like to try to change his sexuality. wtf was what I said back to him over the phone. I asked him how it went? He admitted that he felt ashamed of himself. He’s always been and out and proud type guy so he didn’t know what cmae over him. He’s queer and will always be queer. He got totally turned off by these sites. How so?….I asked. They use brainwashing and like the writer said it’s total immersion where they encouragge a gay guy to watch straight porn. He said he did that for months but got bored with it, but was always looking at the guy and not the woman. Lots of lying is used because they’ll take a sex pic and put some anti-queer caption on it. Like they took this well known gay porn actor and used his picture in a caption about how he had converted to straight. Liar, liar pants on fire! That gay actor is still gay. I asked about the homophobia and the groan he let out over the phone was so loud…..that said it all. Good to know it’s only a small group of gay guys are into this head trip, fetish or whatever it’s really called. He said that the people into it spend day and night into it so it’s an addiction to them. For a gay guy to say that he became a real man just because he fucked a girl is nothing but machismo hogwash. Why don’t they just come out themselves and get on with their lives. He said some the guys say they’ve sort of always lived in the closet.

  3. D8

    “Not a lot of guys there. Less than 10. ”

    He didn’t say, but if they hang out on that site day and night then they’re not out there trying to get vagina which makes it all sound like pure fantasy.

  4. castro local

    just wanted to tell you and your readers this. guess who was standing in front of the hardware store in the castro this afternoonn? the salvation army ringing their bell. the old castro would have been in an uproar over this. but this afternoon the few people walking about didn’t seem to care.

    allow me to quote what “e in sunnyvale” wrote in a comment recently about the salvation army:

    “Also, now that it’s the “holiday season”, the Salvation Army bell-ringing bigots are out in force soliciting donations. Let’s not forget that the Salvation Army is a right-wing “christian” organization that refuses to provide assistance or employment to queer people, and has now issued an internal gag order barring any of its employees from discussing the matter with the public. I have printed out some slips of paper basically stating that I refuse to donate to the Salvation Army, but that I will give to organizations and charities that do not discriminate based on a person’s gender or sexuality or any other reason. If I see a bell-ringer, I’ll drop one of those slips in the bucket. Maybe if enough people do the same thing, the message might get through… nah, probably not.”

    i really really can’t understand the “gay conversion” interest. good to read so few are into it. those who are on the conservative side like your guest writer said. before i came out of the closet i fucked a few girls in high school to fit in with the other guys and the smell that bram wrote about is not a figment of his imagination. it’s very real. that’s what i complained about to the other guys in school. they would laugh and say to put whip cream and strawberries in her pussy so that when you’re performing cunnilingus on her it can try to camouflage the smell. i think you could have doused her with perfume and that smell would have permeated the room with or without perfume.

Fin. The End.