El 15 de agosto de 2014. Hola, I was talking with mi amigo yesterday. We were in San Francisco’s Castro barrio (the fading gay mecca). We noticed several things:
Market Street was mainly “straight”/heterosexual from Castro down to Sánchez Street with obnoxious and drunk “straights” on every block we were on. The loud/obnoxious supposedly-gay sports bar was mostly filled with females and guys. It was loud as usual. It looked like a typical “straight” sports bar when we walked by and looked in. They don’t fly the Rainbow Flag at that bar. I think the Rainbow Flag is “too gay” for them with their jocks and wanna-be-jock, or are they concerned that the Rainbow Flag will offend the “straights.” If so, WTF are they doing in The Castro then? Then we walked over to Castro/Market Streets and saw two—what looked like—high school students (male-female) holding hands. As is usually the case, the female was clearly in dire need of attention from the guy. Waiting for the light to change to cross the street, the female got up on her tip toes as if she were craving attention from the guy. I felt like yelling to her (but didn’t): Maybe it would be easier for you if you just climbed up on his shoulders, or you could get a harness and perch yourself up there on his shoulders if you’re that desperate for his attention. Mi amigo and I have seen this type of male-female behaviour so often around here from females with guys. As is usually the case, the female was 2-3 feet shorter than the guy. He leaned down to give Ms. Needy a beso/kiss. That seemed to pacify this needy-assed female at least temporarily.
Mi amigo looked over at me and said: I honestly don’t know how heterosexuals put up with this programmed sexist shit.
Then another “straight” couple (they were not holding hands) came up the sidewalk to cross Castro and as they proceeded to cross the street, the female (being a very vigilant and in-your-face Feminist…I’m being sarcastic) grabbed onto the guy she was with and put her left hand around his arm so they could be connected as a “straight” couple as they crossed Castro street. Mi amigo saw the same thing I saw and he asked me: Does that female think that that guy is going to “protect” her as they cross the street? If he’s hit by a car, she will go down with him because she’s clinging on/hooked on to him like someone walking their dog.
These sights that I’ve described that we saw on our walk reminded us of just how much programming the heterosexuals are subjected to by society, which they rarely if ever question. What the guy is supposed to do with and for the female specifically. The guy is always supposed to do something for the female: buy her something (and if it’s not the correct gift he’ll get hell for it from the female/Ms Gracious), the guy is supposed to do this, do that.
I wouldn’t have any of it! Chauvinism/sexism is back “in” and by all indications the Feminist Movement is dead in San Francisco, of all places. “Liberal San Francisco?” HA! It’s time to delete those words. “Liberal San Francisco” is a thing of the past. That’s the old/former Alternative and Proudly-Radical City, especially since these sexist/chauvinistic techies took over the city.
Mi amigo/my friend is as alert to this sexist nonsense as I. Mi amigo said: I’d love to ask these “straight” couples why they are even over here in the “fading gay mecca” Castro and not over in a historically heterosexual area of the city, meaning any other area of the city. The “straight” couple might say: “we came over here to support the gays.” (Translation: They came over here to get drunk with drink specials in the gay bars, make out with each other in the gay bars and make an ass out of themselves while weaving down the sidewalk and possibly throwing up on it, which really has nothing at all to do with “supporting the gays.” That’s just a bull shit line/excuse for coming over here). Maybe they’re over here because they’re gay but pretending to be “straight” as many gay closet cases do.
Fortunately, gay people generally don’t have all of this sexist, societal programmed baggage of what one person is supposed to do for the other. For example, in the hetero world, the guy is supposed to do this and do that for the seemingly helpless female. She can’t even pull out her own damn chair at a table or open her own door on cars, apparently. Although I’ve seen feminist female friends of mine have no trouble at all pulling out their own chair at a table or opening their own doors or doing anything else! It’s a wonder that guys haven’t been programmed to open the menu at restaurants for the female too. I guess I shouldn’t have said that as some needy female reading this will now expect the guy she’s with to open her menu for her. I’d ask her: Do you want him to eat for you too or are you capable of doing that, Ms Helpless? Ugh.
As I was writing this, another Queer amigo of mine who dated females before he came out of the closet told me of his experience with females and the vast amount of requirements with females, and I typed what he said as he told me about it to include it here. He said:
“From the minute you’re born to the minute you die heterosexual sexuality and families are indoctrinated into a person with the requirement that males must be taller than females. One is taught that females are and must be weak and so-called “dainty.” The male has to open doors for the female, the male has to pull out chairs for the female, the male has to do any hard work for the weak, dainty, little female. It is required that the male hold the female in some way under his “wing” while walking and that the female look up at the male and get up on her tippy toes and swoon to the male partner. The male is required to buy Valentine’s Day cards, flowers and candy, birthday presents/cards, anniversary cards/flowers, holiday candies and presents, and at least a bunch of flowers once a month. The female is not required to buy the male anything. It’s only one-way (the gift giving). If you don’t give the female the right gift (meaning the gift she thinks she should have or deserves), the male can be subjected to what I call a vaginal blow-out/emotional melt-down. With females, one never knows what their emotions will be like from one minute to the next. They can be seemingly happy one minute and crying the next. It’s an emotional roller coaster as if they have an internal switch they turn on and off or can’t control. Females are completely unpredictable emotionally but if you tell them this they have no idea what you’re talking about. They deny it. That’s one reason why I had trouble with females. That instant on/off switch in their mood swings was unpredictable and I couldn’t deal with it. “Keeping Up Appearances” is a must along with rearing children. It’s the same as people’s requirement to have coffee every morning. My experience with the females I dated and with females in general (and it’s still true to this day) is that many females consistently make some of the worst decisions based on their emotions rather than on sound judgment using critical thinking. Some guys make bad decisions too but it’s different with females. My experience with guys is that guys use less emotion and guys don’t allow their emotions to take over their decisions. With females, it’s emotions from my experience.”
What sexist, chauvinistic bull shit, but gracias for that mi amigo. Very interesting. I appreciate it. I couldn’t deal that. No way. He tells me he is so much happier to not be with a female now and all the baggage that comes with that.
No, I couldn’t put up with that caca either! I wouldn’t do it. I wouldn’t do well as a “straight” person at all. In part, because I would refuse to do all of that societal-programmed basura/garbage that mi amigo told me about in the paragraph above and that the sheeple have been programmed with by their families, friends and the corporate media. And that’s exactly what it is: societal-programmed garbage. It’s sexist nonsense. And organised religion is part of the sexism as well. I wouldn’t have the patience for it. If a female can’t open her own damn car door, then she can park her ass on the sidewalk until she’s able to (excluding medical conditions), and the same for anybody else. I don’t kowtow to anyone because of their gender. Stop all this sexist behaviour.
I know in reality that the sexist behaviour will continue regardless and probably get ever worse. I just don’t participate in any of it. And when I have the opportunity I point it out to people and maybe even wake some people up and they will say, “I’ve never thought about that, but you know, you right. It is sexist.” Or, they’ll say: I disagree with you. I like all of that stuff because I believe that the female should be the little subservient to the (big) superior guy because that’s what my parents and my religious beliefs have taught me and I see it on television too.
Mi amigo said that his sister is sexist (ex. “ladies first”), but it wouldn’t do any good to tell her. Recently in a restaurant the server came to the table to take everyone’s order and began with mi amigo. Well, mi amigo said that his sister nearly spun her head off in shock/surprise that the server wasn’t beginning with her to take her order first. The server noticed her behaviour (how could you not?!) and then apologised, which he shouldn’t have done. Mi amigo said his sister’s behaviour was embarrassing and he didn’t noticed whether his mother noticed her or not, but it wasn’t the first time his sister has been embarrassing in situations like this. I asked mi amigo: Well what difference does it make who orders first or when as long as everyone order what they want to eat? He agreed it should make no difference. And having to begin with the females and taking all their orders first is sexist. Just start with someone—anyone, whoever is ready to order—and go around the table taking orders. This reminds me of that LBGT nonsense. That too is sexist but apparently no one has ever thought about it.
I also know that the sexism/chauvinism I’m seeing now in San Francisco’s Castro barrio is not new at all. It’s just new for me seeing it on the streets and in restaurants and elsewhere in The Castro as sexist “straights” seem adamant in their desire to invade and take over The Castro. They’re very “in your face” with their sexuality—something “straights” long-complained about with gay people—so as to let everyone know that they’re “straight,” (as if anyone cares!) or trying to give that impression. I’m so accustomed to the decades of the now-fading gay mecca where mostly gay guys lived in my area (the Castro/Upper Market area of San Francisco). Things have definitely changed around here as the GLBTQ populace has been and is continuing to be gentrified out of the city with the help of a corporatist, conservative gay politician. (And this is happening to the delight of the conservatives, including gay conservatives, who absolutely adore their messiah/conservative gay Politician Cocks who is in part responsible for turning this city to the right.) During the Gay Mecca days, when people passed by my windows I would hear the voices of two guys or a group of guys talking usually. Today when two people pass by my apartment I hear the voice of a female who’s often talking loudly and giggling in some high-pitched voice and she’s with a guy who’s talking. I’ve noticed this for awhile now because it’s so unusual to hear this compared with decades past. I could live anywhere and hear female-male couples/voices walking by my window. It does irritate me because I could have stayed where I was if I wanted to hear “straight” voices. I told mi amigo about this and he said:
“Then tonight that guy—who was walking by your window with a female—may get on the site we call ClosetList looking to suck dick, and he’ll say in his ad: “I’m looking to such dick. I have a gf (gf=girlfriend) and she doesn’t know and I want to keep it that way.”
Yes, there are many muchachos/guys on ClosetList just like that. Gay closet cases, pretending to be “straight.” Some of us have wondered repeatedly if that’s why “straights” are so attracted to The Castro, or do they consider The Castro a safe place to come to cheat on their partners because their partners would never expect to look for them in The Castro cheating on them. Chau.—el barrio rosa